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The Single Woman - 5 Dating Tips For Women

When I was in my twenties and thirties my social life was jam packed with potential dates. Men I met at church, golfing or at the beach would ask me out. Today, as a writer I spend most of my time alone at home working. It's not a great place to meet anyone other than the mailman. So, like a lot of women, I've used newspaper ads and the internet to find a potential boyfriend. As an older and hopefully wiser woman, I offer the following advice:

1. Always trust your intuition, even if it does not make sense. If someone's picture or voice mail seems kind of creepy-trust your instincts. You intuition does not have to be explained or offered to anyone. What you feel is what you feel and you need to honor yourself. If you ever find yourself in a position where you are trying to talk yourself into a date, stop and ask yourself how you really feel. What's the first feeling that occurs? Honor your first gut feeling.

2. Don't give out any personal information for a long time. Meet a man in a public place for a cup of coffee or a quick drink. Don't give him your last name. If you like him, agree to meet him again in another public place-maybe at a restaurant for dinner or lunch. For the third date, meet him again in a public place and if you feel safe after that feel free to start giving out personal information. I know a few women who had horrendous experiences dating men they meet on-line. They all gave out personal information too soon. One of these women had to spend months prosecuting a stalker. Better to be overly safe than sorry.

3. Listen for red flags. So there he is across the table telling you all about what a great guy he is, when it slips out, he abandoned his children, or gets drunk on the weekends. Sure he justifies his actions and demonizes his ex-wife or last love, but there are two sides to every story. If you are looking for a good guy or trying to avoid an irresponsible chap, move on. If you can't confront him face to face, send him an email when you get home.

4. Give the nice guy a second chance. Sometimes, we meet a really nice guy but don't feel any attraction. In the long run, you might be much better off with a reliable partner you can trust than a guy with a lot of "bling". Give the nice guy a second date, and be open. You may surprise yourself.

5. When you meet someone, don't be concerned about what he thinks of you; figure out what you think about him. Does he have characteristics you value? Women are often trained to be more concerned about how we will we meet someone else's expectations. We dress, talk and act in hopes that the guy will like us. Let it go. Be yourself and focus on getting to know him. Is he someone you want to spend more time with? If so, let him know at the end of the date or send him a nice email when you get home. It's better to be rejected by a man you really want to be with than be with a man you don't care for even though he really likes you.

Remember the goal of dating is not just to find "THE ONE"; it's to get to know some nice guys and enjoy some male companionship. If you meet someone and it leads to a long term romance or marriage and you both want it, that's great. In the meantime, relax and enjoy your dating life as a single woman.

Kate Garvey is a former Vet Tech and animal rights supporter. She teaches Sound Healing Workshops (throughout the US) and treats clients by appointment in the San Diego area. For more information on how you can use sound for optimal health please visit http://www.InstituteOfSoundHealing.com

Kate is also a freelance writer, published author, and the author of several books; "Aging, Death and Euthanasia-A Guide for People with Pets", "Summer Pet Care Tips", and "The Low Risk Guide for Real Estate Investment."

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